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Post by Admin on Jan 18, 2021 22:56:12 GMT
When you get older, things just change, cool at 30 to you isn't nessicarily what you want or need at 50 or 58 or 60
As I scan Craigslist, the for sale adds, I see cool motorcycles would of died for at 24, and can afford now, I see cool boats, used boats of course, that maybe just 5 years ago would of jumped on to buy and own, but now kind of yawn, even though could pay cash for some low end decent used boats...and so forth.
It's like what was cool and desired at 25, is not so cool to 'self' or desired as much when say...55.
Especially when you learn how hard money is to earn back once it's spent, as you age and still in blue collar realm.
To be honest, not sure what I want going forward anymore.
Use to want a house, then land, then to open business, this and that and so forth, all I want now is to really to just be left alone.
I mean if had a million dollars that's one thing, but when working with limited funds that you have to earn hour by hour, as you age you become way more careful with big buys.
Just not sure what I want or need now as a older single person.
When single, and no one to impress, things just are different.
When trying to impress another, as in if in love, heck, you'll buy a used airplane just to prove you can..cry out loud...but when it's just you...no.
One thing for sure and that never changes, love brings spark to your life, whether at 20 or 80, when in love, either with opposite sex, same sex, or your own biological family, it just tends to drive you, gives you invented purpose in life, you'll take more risks and with confidence.
But when older and single, you just tend to walk a very careful tight rope.
If had a female girlfriend I'd probably buy her 10 pairs of shoes tonight (assuming she had feet that were cute to me), just to prove I could.
Sad, 400 billion people on this planet, and god can't find a single one of them that's right for me...wow.
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Post by Admin on Jan 31, 2021 9:26:11 GMT
Being over the age of 50 these days can be a bit scary Being over the age of 50 these days can be a bit scary, as those coming up behind us are embracing totally different value system, things are changing so rapidly, cultures are changing, blending, and some culture is being deliberately wiped out, like cultural genocide or something. I don't think the newer, younger, generation coming up behind us value 'age' so much, I think 'old people' are like in the way of them or something, and it's like they'd just as well see you die than to try to help you live. I'm watching this 'video game movie'... And it reminds me how so out of touch I am with current trends and all...gamers are like running the world now, literally they are. They hold office now, and or are the sons and daughters of those who do, the sons and daughters of powerful 'influencers'. Us older types who don't know tech stuff are basically screwed, is how I see it. As soon as we can no longer work our usefulness is gone to this new up and coming generation behind us. And the way things are changing so quick, I'd not be surprised in a decade or less, they'll have some 'Logans Run' evaporator for older people, like some voluntary machine that evaporates you once you reach a certain age so no longer a bother to society.  I feel like all the sci-fi movie themes of the past, that we never thought would come true, are now indeed coming true. Just not currently feeling to optimistic about my own future going forward. I already feel like I'm in the way of more useful people.
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Post by Admin on Feb 8, 2021 20:05:30 GMT
In 'dud' mode lately, for last few weeks
I work like 3 days a week, but they're long days, so left with 4 days of leisure, but here's the thing, if not spending money every second of the hour, than what's there to do?
In other words if filthy rich, yes, I'd be out there doing things that cost money, traveling, camping, buying this, ordering that, but when trying to save money and living on moderate income, you'll never save anything.
I basically live as if I'm broke, is the only way I can really save money.
And it works, for this year for the first time in many years, actually see checking account rising, where as before it always stayed the same cause I was spending as much as earning and didn't even realize it.
As an example...say if I had $5,000 in account at start of year, well at end of year would still have $5000.00 in account, sure not broke, but, but, obviously if can work a whole year and still not save, than spending way to much...so fixed that by not spending as much, and by getting rid of extra vehicle and slashing this, cutting that, ending this subscription, ending storage, ect...and it sure helps, like giving self a pay raise or something.
All that aside, I'm basically living now the way I guess those who are retired live, very modestly, so if I'm a bit bored now, I can't imagine how bored I'll be after retirement occurs and if alone and stuck on fixed low wage income..I can't even imagine what a dull life that would be.
I mean at least now I'm still someone 'sexy', and often mistaken for being 10-20 years younger than what really am, but what when actually 'old old', take on that actual 'old' look, then what?
What value will I be to anyone at all?...I mean outside of family, if you're lucky enough to have one, but outside of family still valuing you, aging doesn't seem to fun, or being over the age of 60 and alone, just doesn't seem to fun if poor.
I could be wrong though.
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Post by Admin on Feb 16, 2021 20:36:04 GMT
Even though 'we' don't believe in 'God', funny how we're always talking to him and evoking his name when alone.
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Post by Admin on Feb 22, 2021 10:19:31 GMT
Life when alone, content and happy and just don't care who hates, loves or likes you  Happiness for sure will keep you not just feeling younger, but will also keep you physically younger as well. I told myself when younger I never want to get that 'old person' walk or movement, but rather always want to be able to move about, as I did when in high school. I never want to lose that 'spring chicken' step and charm 'to self', notice I didn't say to others, but rather to self. I think the mind more powerful than we think, and if you think yourself 19 all the time, than the mind, brain, I guess convinces rest of body you really are....who knows. But even pondering silly stuff like that, like we all did when 19, is apart of staying young. Is there anything wrong with age?...no, at least not the wisdom that comes with it, but a lot of other baggage comes with age as well, bitterness, anger and more, if not careful, and biases, bigotry and a hardened heart. I want none of that. Anyways, back to being goofy and silly, cause I can, and I'm off work, and have a few more days of being off.
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Post by Admin on Feb 28, 2021 5:06:58 GMT
Sometimes when get over the age of 50, you just wake up, and wonder why even still alive and functioning.
That is if a day to day survival type, if above age 50 and a millionaire or well off, you just love life even more.
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Post by Admin on Mar 7, 2021 4:39:58 GMT
If 50 and above and don't find this song very sexy, than you're already dead
Wow...
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Post by Admin on Mar 7, 2021 19:35:31 GMT
Now that I'm use to only working 3 days a week, not sure how I can ever go back to working 4 or even 5...I so love having 3-4 days off in a row to just relax and settle back into self.
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Post by Admin on Mar 8, 2021 1:45:29 GMT
I've completed all 16 items on my 'to do list'...now what?
Don't think I've ever done that before so quick...sure they were small 'to do stuff', but still, normally I get distracted and never finish the list...now what?
Create another list, of course.
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Post by Admin on Mar 18, 2021 6:18:23 GMT
Don't really like being around old people who like looking old
Especially old dull looking males with no 'nothing', generic looking whatever's.
Let me stop being mean.
But dull is dull, generic bland looking whatever.
Is why I do like rock star types, at least rock star types, or movie stars understand that looks do matter and go out of their way to look young, vibrant and exiting, unlike older gent I saw today, at job, dull looking as a moe hoe...gross...no flavor at all, like looking at a dead person who's still alive.
If going to be around me, be colorful please, as in let me know you still care about how you look.
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Post by Admin on Mar 23, 2021 15:33:53 GMT
50 + what?
50 + what?, is how I feel right now.
I should jotted some thing down on here last night but to lazy to find my way here.
Watched a few cool movies, been doing that more lately since my own creativeness is kind of on vacation right now.
Moods come and go, like seasons, one week I'm excited about 'this', the next week I'm not.
The only purpose I really seem to have right now in life is employment, outside of my obligation to employer, seems I really just do not exist, no where or to anyone.
There are pet dogs, pet cats, that serve more purpose than I do in life at the moment.
Not saying that's good or bad, just stating it as a fact.
There are animals that will have had more impact on peoples lives than I have as of late.
But I cannot battle or change fate.
When younger I tried to matter, but it did not matter that I tried to matter, I could just never find my zone in this world or society.
And the older I get, the less I care about finding it.
Anyways, one more day to roll around, before I have to go back to work, the one think that keeps me relevant to anything down here on this planet.
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Post by Admin on Apr 7, 2021 4:39:54 GMT
Tempted to go look at a used yellow Camaro tomorrow with very low miles on it  Would owning a Yellow Camaro improve my life?...who knows, maybe, in that maybe it would boost my moral, self esteem and thus motivate me to go out more, like I use to. I guess one never really knows how a newer, more cool, car will effect them until you get one or test drive it. But there's probably better things I could spend my money own at my age, better investments, better but not more fun. I've been saving and saving and saving money for over a year and it just gets boring after a while if never spend on anything grand. I see all kinds of investment gigs on YouTube, like during those adds, where people flash checks onto the screen and they're like ' 'Look what I earned last month, all from the comfort from my home', type of stuff, but seems the more you dig, investigate, sooner or later there's a catch, always some large either one time member fee or subscription to 'how to earn more money'. So that right there tells you they're earning money from 'you', and not from any actually product...they're earning money from selling how to earn money..either way life is short, and really don't want to spend rest of life worrying about earning money, if I don't have it when older, than I guess I'll just join the ranks of the homeless. Until then though, I do kind of want to still have a bit of fun while young and healthy enough to do so.
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Post by Admin on Apr 13, 2021 2:14:47 GMT
My problem is that I just don't have that whole European, industrial way, greed at all costs, stock market, worship money vein or spirit within me
I mean look for like the last 500 years or so, it's all been about greed, captitolism conquest, blood and more, and that's just not me..is probably why still so fiscally average.
Big banks, Stock market, port folios, dividends, retirement funds ect, it's just not me.
I'm more of a live now while alive and be happy type, like many of our ancestors were like, even if European.
Most people just want to live out life around their families, small village and be left the hell alone.
But the European industrial age changed all of that, now suddenly Kings and Queens, future princes and princesses, swept off their land, from all tongues and cultures, and reduced to nothing more than a labor force getting paid pennies per hour, if that.
Suddenly go from being able to roam all 'land' to greedy Real Estate types deciding the price of land and pricing 'gods land' out of the wages of common people.
All this is gross to me.
And no, not for communism or capitalism what I am for is freedom, freedom to live and be left alone, like the Hobbits in the movie 'Lord of the Rings'...they just lived in clusters, mainly for safety, but there was no central controlling Government doing this or that.
Notice how people starving and all only came about after the colonial powers took over, drove people off their lands, forced to live in shante towns where could no longer grow food, and now deliberate victim of the system...all that was a 'created reality'...and it's gross to me.
The Peoples of Africa and other areas survived for 10's of 1000's of years, and notice how only until Colonial powers took over that you suddenly had starvation and poverty and sickness ect...ask yourself why...be honest and ask yourself why?
Either way 'you' weren't alive back then and had nothing to do with what took place, so don't be afraid to be honest.
Even both capitolism and Marxism are European terms and concepts...other peoples around the world did not live by either.
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Post by Admin on Apr 15, 2021 6:54:53 GMT
Just got in from work, I go to work feeling decent, but always when I get off, my mood changes, I come back feeling grouchy, especially if have to work the following day.
It's just my work days are so long, and 'blue collar', cause I drive, and imagine doing that for 12-13 hours a day, traffic, noise, vibration, traffic lights, construction, it just all adds up and isn't natural, machinery just isn't natural.
Man celebrates machinery and noise and oil and fumes and engines, I don't...it's just the world I was born into.
Oddly though, the best times of my life looking back are during times abscent of noise, machinery, industry, technology ect...the best times I ever had, looking back, was when younger, on camping trips, with the scouts, or family or school, or friends, no noise, no cell phones, just us, our personalities and imagination.
I so wish I could get back to that reality before I get to much older and just stop caring about anything.
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Post by Admin on Apr 17, 2021 3:35:04 GMT
I think I like my 10th grade self better than I like my 'today self'
I think I was at my apex best in the 10th or maybe eleventh grade, I think that's when live was best for me.
And every since then it's been like a down hill roll, do to many factors, including 'religion'.
In the 10th grade I was raw and alive, and had friends that appreciated that.
Now I'm just 'alive', and no one appreciates that fact.
Like I'm just here, and that's it.
I miss my 10-11th grade self and the friends I had back then.
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